u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
