my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
