That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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