pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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