I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
At least life still wants to fuck me.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
