yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
