am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Randomize
