the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize