i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
