I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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