More tranny stories later!
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
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