Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
