...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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