is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
