it wasn't lemon gatorade
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
