apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
