Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
operation harelip BJ is a go
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize