And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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