Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
