my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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