I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize