my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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