Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you traded sex for a burrito?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Can I color on your dick again?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
