But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
