i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
