hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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