Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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