dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
