accomplished twins. life is a go
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
fuck your aforementioned shoe
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
