so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
