the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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