Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
