If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
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