just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Randomize
