Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
