that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
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