i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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