It's Friday. Sex?
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
