It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
