in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
