He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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