His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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