I wish i was in the wii world.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
you never un-have a 4some
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
