I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Welp...herpes.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
