is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Randomize
