Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
