is wine microwaveable?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Randomize
