please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
