just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize