She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
