Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
