I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
