Whatcha textin bout Willis?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
