you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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